Monday, February 28, 2011

Oh, Neupogen...you are a pain in my bones :)

Well, Chemo day was not unfortunately today due to my neutrophils again not being quite high enough to receive treatment...grrr. However my Platelet levels were great :)....So, the Dr gave me a Neupogen shot in the arm today (this will stimulate the growth of my neutrophils from my bone marrow) and all will be well. My levels will be up within a few days and I will have Chemo on Wednesday of this week and then will fall back into my regular routine of Monday Chemo days. Can you believe all of the drugs that they can give to Cancer patients now to help our bodies along the way during treatments? Absolutely amazing. The only side effect I have had from Neupogen so far is bone pain, yes, I said it...bone pain. The Dr said to expect it and now I am feeling it....yes. From my neck to my back down to my legs. hahahaha...kind of feels like how I felt when I was 9 months pregnant. geesh. But How I love Neupogen for boosting my cells to allow me to get treatment this week! He will continue to give me this shot two days before each treatment to keep my levels up.
My Dr today was amazed at how well I've been doing! He said he's never seen anyone tolerate Chemo so well and with the drugs I've been on. IT'S BECAUSE I'M STRONG THROUGH OUR GOD AND HE MAKES ME STRONG. Also AMAZING news...he was not able to feel the tumor in my breast upon assessment! AND the mass in my right underarm has dramatically decreased. I'm talking about it has shrunk from a softball down to a nut in 5 weeks of Chemo. PRAISE GOD! And I still have 5 more months to go!!! I pray for complete healing, cancer free by the end of my treatments. TRUST, FAITH, BELIEVE.
I turn 30 tomorrow! Each year is a celebration of life. A blessing. I'm beginning to seek out the things in life that bring me much joy and excitement. Passion. It is something that I wish upon everyone to do and challenge you to do. Don't wait or make excuses. Live your life.
About 6 years ago I began riding Dressage, which is an equestrian sport. Riding horses brings much pleasure and joy in my life and is extremely therapeutic. It has been 2 years since I have ridden (since my pregnancy and my daughter was born) and tomorrow, on my birthday, I will start riding again!!! YAY!!! I found an excellent equestrian stables and will begin riding a few times a month as long as I can during treatments. Therapeutic. Happiness.

Have a great week everyone!
Much love! THINK PINK!

Jen

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Quarantined.

Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE and a FUTURE."

One of my favorite verses. This past week has been challenging for me on a different level. emotionally. I know it's just a natural part of my healing process and that it's important for me to except each feeling in the moment, pull myself together and power forward. And that is what I am doing. I cannot say enough how blessed I am to have such loving family here to support me and lift me up when I need it. My husband is the most compassionate and loving man and god is so gracious to have put him in my life. He has been strong, understanding, patient and so positive through our journey. I'm blessed to have a little girl that loves life as much as she does. She is surrounded by a blanket of love everyday and she gives just as much back.

My heart aches this week for Ava, she is staying all week and weekend with Nana and Poppy because she is sick. I am on neutropenic precautions (my neutrophils, which are our first line of defense against infection, are pretty low.) which means I must hang low in my house for about a week, avoid sickness, wear a mask when leaving the house, avoid large crowds. If I were to get sick, this can be dangerous, even fatal during Chemo. My body has no fighting mechanism when my neutrophils are low. Not to be taken lightly. To fight strong I have to protect myself! But my heart aches for my little sweet pea.
I'm resting a lot this week, very important. I feel tired, and have a constant headache, and my body is ache. But I'm strong, and I'm powering forward. I'm Thankful. blessed.

I'm hitting a milestone soon, the big 30 just a week or so away!! We were going to have a family celebration this weekend but now since I'm quarantined :) in my house we are postponing for a later date. Was so looking forward to being with all of my sisters and family :(
I have Chemo on Monday but I'm hoping that I will feel good on Tuesday to celebrate a little.

I hope everyone is enjoying this week and God bless!

Jen

Monday, February 21, 2011

Yes, I would like a bag-o-platelets...or two please. Thank you.

My body responded over the weekend it a gentle little reminder that it was time to give me my first break from Chemo and let it re build all those good cells we need to fight on! Sunday morning I had multiple nose bleeds so I called the nurse on call for my Doctor and was instructed to head on into the hospital to get my Platelet count checked. So indeed my counts were low and I was in need for a platelet transfusion...it was painless and quick. We spent most of our day at the hospital but the actual transfusion only lasted 30 minutes. I was able to go home and rest after wards.

I was scheduled for Chemo this morning, so we went in and had my labs drawn and checked to see if I would be able to tolerate Chemo today but like I said my body is in need for a weeks rest to regenerate and my Labs were too low. My platelet count had gone up a little since the transfusion but not enough to be able to get chemo. AND my neutrophils, which are our first fight against infection were pretty low, too low to get todays round of Chemo. Which means I have to avoid large crowds, wear a mask if I am out, and avoid anyone with a cold or that is sick. My mom so graciously took Ava in for a few days because our little sweet pea is sick with a cold. I miss her already. Thank you Mom for thinking of my well being and taking care of Ava!

This is all completely normal and expected, so no worries :) No one can expect to go every week with Chemo without a week off. I went 5 weeks with no breaks until now, WHOOP WHOOP! I am strong and my body is strong through our GOD. I will see my Doctor on Monday followed with Chemo. This week my goal is to REST and to stay HEALTHY.

Do not be afraid of tomorrow, for God is already there.

Thank you all for your prayers!

Love,

Jen

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Hello.

Good afternoon! I just have to give a little shout out...WHOOP WHOOP! This week marks the 5th week of Chemo! We are into the second month. YES! Last week I was more tired than usual. I have been snoozing like a baby! Nap time in my house has included momma. Last week in was time to receive both of my chemo drugs together. It works on a cycle. I get the same chemo drug every week and then they add the second drug every 3rd week. When I receive both drugs it just takes effect on my body a little more than the other weeks. I'm extremely tired, but I rest...A LOT in the first first few days. And then mainly just take a nap when Ava does the rest of the week. The nausea is more heightened but very controllable with my meds that the Dr. prescribed me! I'm so grateful to have family here to help me when I am not quite myself. Seriously, the support that I have been given from family and friends is heaven sent. I cannot say Thank You enough! I love you all!

We are so blessed to be able to continue to keep Ava in school two days a week. She loves going and it has been wonderful for her! It also provides me those two days after chemo to rest and regain my energy! I am also proud to announce that Ava has switched over to a toddler bed....BIG GIRL! She transitioned beautifully. She is growing up way too fast.

This week has been great, round 5 of chemo was a breeze and I have regained good energy this week! I had a mother/daughter day out Tuesday and it was fabulous to get out and about! And it was 72 degrees! Since our snow Apocalypse in the past few weeks I had not ventured out of the house and was feeling a little cramped so it felt AMAZING and refreshing to get out in the beautiful weather and enjoy the day.

I have begun working out again and am planning to run/walk a 5k in march here in Tulsa. We have a lot of 5k here in Tulsa all year round. Susan G. Komen race for the cure will be held in September this year in Tulsa...we are planning on getting a big team together and running! FUN! If you have never participated in a Race for the cure event, I highly recommend it. The energy at this event is enough to make you do back handsprings for 2 miles :)

God continuous to bless me everyday. I am forever thankful for this experience. I am not angry or sad that I have cancer. Don't get me wrong, I do have weak moments and struggles but this has turned my life around and opened my eyes. My purpose in this life is now so easy to see, it's all for him, our God.

I Read this verse last night and wanted to share it with you.

Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, "I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won't have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life."

Much love! Think Pink!

Jen

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Sunday Delight.

I have found comfort in this verse today, and everyday.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

I know that I have been called for his purpose, to serve him. How thankful and blessed I am to have my eyes wide open upon him. My heart inlined with his.

A friend sent this verse to me and I keep it close to my heart along with many others.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

I hope everyone has enjoyed the weekend! Ours was filled with whole wheat pancakes and strawberries, a trip to the whole foods store (exciting!!! no seriously, love this grocery store), cleaning, playing and MORE playing with Ava, snow shoveling (ok...so I didn't partake in this activity but my strong husband did an excellent job), LifeChurch, movies, naps, filing taxes, and we will top it off by having dinner with my parents tonight. Delight.

Wanted to share the most awesome NEWS of today! My sister Suzy was baptized during her church service today! I am so proud of her!!! I love you Sis, I look up to you in every way! Your faith is amazing.
Much love to you all, Think pink!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Quote of the Day

If children have the ability to ignore all odds and percentages, then maybe we can all learn from them. When you think about it, what other choice is there but to hope? We have two options, medically and emotionally: give up, or fight like hell. ~Lance Armstrong


Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Embrace the change. Thankful for everyday.



I feel absolutely wonderful this week after chemo treatment #3! Barely any nausea and my energy level has been amazing. My hair began to fall out heavily over the last few days so last night I decided it was time to bring out the shavers. My sweet husband did the honors and was so gentle with my little noggin. Thank you, babe.
I've taken on my new look with confidence and purpose. This is my fight. I am also very happy to say that my 20 month old daughter, Ava did not scream and run the other direction this morning when she saw her bald momma. She embraced me with all the unconditional love that she normally does without a blink of an eye. Love her. I hope everyone is having a good week! Much love to you all!

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Snow day!

Let my heart be still. She absolutely melts me to pieces!!! LOVE HER! I love snow days! It's full of cuddles on the couch with my sweet hubby and daughter, movies, yummy food and warm drinks, and of course playing in the snow. GOOD THERAPY. I hope everyone is staying warm and enjoying this beautiful winter wonderland!